Just Die Already [Xbox]
Developed by DoubleMoose Games - a game studio founded by some of the designers of Goat Simulator - Just Die Already is an extreme sandbox simulator where you play as one of a group of pensioners, whose sole purpose is to Just. Die. Already. Before we go any further I just want to point out how much I absolutely adore the logo. It’s just so happy and cute, and innocent - totally juxtaposing the game - and I love it. Anyway, where was I? Ah yes, in JDA you will test out the limits of your old, yet not-so-fragile body, to see just how far it’ll go. There are a myriad of ways for you to debilitate, mutilate and decapitate not only yourself - but the other residents of your residential home and city, whether that be through getting hit by cars, squished by steam rollers, blown up by landmines or chomped by piranhas; everything is a hazard.
You can play alone, or you can play online co-op with friends or in random matchmaking - and this is a lot of fun, if a little chaotic. There’s the freedom to act as friend or foe, either letting other players do their thing, or by just chasing them down and smushing them. Depending on your intentions when playing online, you might have a hard time - if you’re looking for someone to help out with specific tasks, then you’re probably best to just host a game with a friend. You’ve got a ‘Bucket List’ of tasks to complete, and doing so will net you new items, weapons and costume pieces along the way. Tasks range from blowing off body parts a certain number of times, utilising different weapons to dying in all manner of ways. Some will be ticked off just through natural progression, whilst others require a bit more effort - with some feeling almost impossible to achieve. Even trying to get through to some areas feels harder than it needs to, with very specific items required. The gates in the Zen Garden for instance, you can use a normal stick of dynamite to get through the main gates, but the Temple Gate, that looks the same, required the timed throwable bomb to open (which took way longer to figure out than I’d like to admit!).
With wacky physics and bright, cartoony visuals, Just Die Already looks great. There’s a lot of stuff for you to interact with, and there are things available in the world that will alter how things play, such as pills to prevent ragdolling, costume bunny ears that will make you faster and even a golden Buddha you can hide inside, turning you into one too. There are loads of weapons to be found in the world, from actual weapons such as guns and samurai swords to floppy lightsabers and huge fish you can slap people with. There are different areas in the map that will be unlocked as you play, each with their own unique look and feel. There’s a severe lack of music in the world, with no soundtrack in the background as you play. There are the occasional radios that you’ll stumble upon, and you’ll have a brief bit of music from things like this - but aside from those, the world is only filled with environmental sounds, explosions and the frequent screaming of both you and any potential victims in your path.
There’s a lot of humour in JDA, from the interactions with NPCs to even just random things you’ll notice whilst playing. After finding a secret furry dungeon, we picked up a furry tail butt-plug, that can actually be equipped. But that’s not all, dear readers, no no - after using the stealth ability from a ninja mask which turns you invisible, the huge plug was actually visible inside our little oldie. Some of the things that are initially funny do end up grating on you a bit, like when you do a pathetic jump when trying to reach a new place and end up completely blowing out your knees. You’ll laugh at first, but after a few more failed attempts, you’ll start to feel your own blood pressure rising.
Controls are a tad floaty at times, with the rag doll physics being hard to control, but that’s all part of the fun. The camera is the most frustrating part to control, as there are loads of times you’ll try to jump from one thing to another, and the camera just obscures your vision, causing it to be far more difficult. You’ve got a wide variety of things to do, and you’ll witness plenty of absurdity; from NPCs attacking each other, to sheep bouncing around due to landmines. You’ll spot JDA tickets hidden around the world, and some of these are straightforward to reach, but others will need you to be a little more creative in your approach. Finding these enables you to purchase items from the Blue Vending Machine, which will unlock them within the Pink and Yellow machines located around the map. Pink machines contain weapons, and yellow contains different wearable items - and these provide a way to easily get the stuff you need when ticking off your Bucket List.
There are new areas for you to unlock and tonnes of secrets waiting to be found, and it all pulls you in, making you want to keep trying to figure out how to do things. Some doors can only be unlocked when you’re missing certain body parts, and you’ll come across gates and chests that need golden keys to open. There’s also a bunch of different puzzles to be solved that are harder than they look, requiring you to really look around to complete them. Overall, it’s a lot of fun to play - it’s not a serious game by any means, so if you’re looking for something to give you a good laugh, you can nab Just Die Already for £11.99 on the Xbox Store.
In the end, we decided to give Just Die Already the Collecting Asylum rating of 8/10.
Have you played Just Die Already yet? What did you think of it?
Let us know in the comments below!
- V x
Thank you to DoubleMoose Games for the Just Die Already Xbox review code!
